Is Your Girlfriend Really That Busy?

Or Maybe Her Priorities (and Yours) Have Shifted.

“I’d love to do that, but I don’t have the time.” This is a lie we tell ourselves according to Steve Chandler in his book 37 Ways to Boost Your Coaching Practice.

As I read this quote, I thought of the coffee date I had arranged with an old friend I hadn’t seen in a while. Somehow, she had drifted out of my life. When we bumped into each other, she seemed genuinely happy to see me and I was happy to see her. That got me thinking, It would be nice to catch up and reconnect. So I texted her, asking if she wanted to hang out, reconnect, get a coffee, or take a walk. “I’d love to,” she texted, “I’ll check my calendar when I get home”. That was on Monday. By Thursday, when I hadn’t heard back, I followed up. Of course I did; that was my usual MO.

Her text confirmed that she could meet me for twenty minutes the following Monday. 20 minutes. Wow! What a gift!

My initial reaction was a little bit of hurt and a bruised ego. But I took a breath. “She has kids, a husband and a business that keep her super busy.” I told myself. “Don’t take it personally, “

I took another breath, smiled and confirmed with a heart emoji.

It was two days later that I read Steve Chandler’s explanation for the I don’t have the time lie: